Reviewed By: traves8853
Review Date: 9/30/15 9:38 pm
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'The Ratings War' was a 2002 Big Finish audio drama, featuring the Sixth Doctor taking on one of his old comic strip foes, Beep the Meep. Originally released as an inclusion with Doctor Who Magazine #313, it was later offered free to the public. Written by Steve Lyons and Directed by Gary Russell. Beep has hypnotised the owner of a television station and is planning to use subliminal control to enslave a murderous psychotic army, through his new show 'Beep and friends', when the Doctor confronts him.
The music is mediocre and the atmosphere is rather dull. The modulation on Beep's voice doesn't exactly evoke intimidation but then again maybe there is an intended symmetry there with his appearance. Personal I think it clashes with the tone of his dialogue.
'Beep the Meep' was the leader of the Meeps and a galactic criminal who referred to himself as the Most-High. Beep was a sadist, enjoying inflicting pain on others for no real purpose. He resented being thought of as cute, but used it to his advantage when manipulating people. He also disliked other cute things and would go out of his way to destroy them. Beep is played by BF regular Toby Longworth.
Once again we get 'the means justify the end' situation where the Doctor could kill Beep to save many lives but predictably refuses. There is nothing particularly original about any of this. At just over half an hour this short play attempts cast a satirical eye of the reality show genre. To be honest, I don't find this funny or entertaining. It’s as cliched as evil, sinister looking clowns. The singing dolls that sing gruesome lyrics in a chirpy tone are on that level. Still it's free so you can't complain, well you can but who would listen? A comic book brought to life.
"Oh we dance and we pray with joy we gush,
As our dreadful song turns your brain to mush,
Join the fun and you’ll see, soon you’ll agree you are Beeps friend after all!
Ask your neighbour round for a bite and a drink,
Then nibble off his face ‘til he’s raw and pink,
Enjoy his surprise as your suck out his eyes, you are Beeps friend smash them all!
Put your dog in a blender and close the lid,
Cut the fur from your hamster to feed your kid,
Slice the fur from your cat, deep-fry him in some fat, you are Beeps friend kill them all!
Grill them all! Grill them all! Kill them all! Kill them all! Killllll Themmm Alllllll!
La la la la la la la la la, La la la la la la la la la la la, La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la laaaaaaaaa
Let the streets run red spread our message of pain,
When they beg for their lives use the pliers again,
No need to ask why, do it for the Most High, you are Beeps friend Conquer Alllllll!"